1. Ruined parties. Abby pushed her way to center stage at a party honoring Phoebe and was a boozy mess at Delia’s bachelorette party. It got so bad, Abby rushed the stage and started peeling off her clothes. Sabotaging festivities is a Real Housewife staple. Real Housewives of Atlanta’s Kenya Moore hosted a boat party this season and it ended in a violent brawl between Cynthia Bailey and Porsha Stewart.
2. Throwing Shade at Friends’ Relationships: Abby had some choice words about Delia’s relationship with Gordon. Yes, the relationship is doomed but Abby—of all people—doesn’t have any business talking about other people’s rocky love lives. During a walk across the Brooklyn Bridge, Real Housewives of New York’s Ramona Singer predicted that Bethenny Frankel would mess up her relationship with Jason Hoppy. The relationship did crash and burn, but so did Ramona’s marriage to Mario so there’s a lesson in there.
3. Throwing drinks. When Abby insulted Delia, the bride-to-be tossed a drink in her face. Classic Housewife maneuver. Unhappy with what her former friend said about her in the press, Tamra Barney splashed Jeana Keogh on Real Housewives of Orange County. Ramona Singer actually managed to draw blood. During a getaway in the Berkshires, Ramona didn’t just toss a drink at fellow RHONY Kristen Taekman, she threw the plastic glass, which cut Kristen’s lip. These ladies need to learn how to hold their liquor … in their hands.
4. Pulling no-shows: Real Housewife of Beverly Hills’ Kim Richards was notorious for being MIA during outings and it was an annoyance to her sister Kyle. Abby has been so focused on herself she’s out of the loop and seems to be absent a lot when Jo, Delia and Phoebe get together.
5. Mean Tweets. After breaking up with celebrity physician Dr. Harris, Abby spotted his fans lining up for a book-signing at the Grove and an awkward scene ensued. The doc’s fans were not impressed and had a lot of unkind words for Abby on Twitter including “Dumpster whore”.  Social media battles are business as usual for Real Housewives. Real Housewives of Beverly Hills Lisa Rinna and Yolanda Foster had a vicious Twitter battle recently.

Girlfriends’ Guide to Divorce airs Tuesdays at 10/9 on Bravo

1. Abby hasn’t been showing up for friends in need. She’s been MIA during bonding sessions with her besties. Phoebe was devastated when Marco broke up with her and she needed hand-holding. Jo was confronted with the return of her ex-husband and his new wife, who usurped Jo’s mothering role and tried to take over the bakery. Delia’s life is a big mess as she contends with a wedding she isn’t enthused about and a marriage that is doomed to fail. It’s gotten so bad that when Jo had a threatening encounter with her kinky Tinder date, she went crying to Jake—Jake! Abby’s estranged husband and best friend kind of hate each other and yet Jake is the one comforting Jo. We are always Team Jo, so Abby better watch her step.
2. When Abby does show up, it’s for the wrong people. For some reason, Abby inserted herself in the middle of Jake’s baby mama drama. When Abby and Jake split, he turned to CW show starlet Becca Riley. Becca got pregnant, presumably with Jake’s baby, but then they broke up and Jake left the country for a while. Becca is a big girl and capable of taking care of herself, but Abby moved Becca into her guest house and acted like a helicopter mom. Guess what? The baby was not sired by Jake. Congrats on your new bundle of joy, Taye Diggs!
3. Abby’s not confiding in her friends. It makes sense that she doesn’t want the public to know that she was presenting herself as the carefree divorcée while sneaking around with her estranged husband—it’s a mixed message. There was no reason to keep her besties in the dark. She’s not obligated to tell them all the details of her life, but she’s a love life exhibitionist on Twitter, so it’s weird. Maybe she didn’t want them to tell her the truth: The reconciliation attempt was a bad idea.
4. Abby’s biting the hand that feeds her. She was haughty with Barbara before she learned that Babs is actually her SheShe editor and extraordinarily mouthy with the book editor, Kat. Creative differences are one thing but yelling at an editor isn’t a smart move. There are way more authors and would-be celeb gurus than editors so she needs to watch her step.
5. Abby is a mean girl. Former model Phoebe got her GED and Abby downplayed, maybe even mocked, her friend’s major accomplishment.
6. Abby is an attention hog. She was clearly miffed when Barbara offered Phoebe an opportunity to write an article for SheShe. Why was Abby so threatened? As a graduation celebration, Phoebe got to have a prom. Abby made it all about herself.  She was even more blatant at Delia’s bachelorette party when she jumped on the stage and performed a sloppy striptease. God Abby, you even stole the male dancer’s thunder!
7. Abby doesn’t eat cake. Despite Abby’s bad behavior, Jo brought her a birthday cake, which Abby just picked at. Yes, carbs are the enemy, but you have to give side-eye to a woman who won’t even cheat on her birthday—especially when the cake is from your best friend’s gourmet bakery.

Get it together, Abby or your Girlfriend card will be revoked.

Girlfriends’ Guide to Divorce airs Sundays at 10/9c on Bravo.

The latest episode of Girlfriend’s Guide to Divorce, “Rule #36: If You Can’t Stand the Heat, You’re Cooked” offered some twists, surprises and revelations as delicious as one of Scott’s baked goods. Well, that might be hyperbole—is there anything as delicious as Scott’s baked goods? No, there is not. Here are the OMG moments in no particular order.

1. Dear sweet JD is coming out of his shell a little bit. Phoebe’s new boyfriend went from a painfully shy guy with no experience whatsoever to a painfully shy guy with enough confidence-building experience to attempt small talk. Behold the power of Phoebe! JD has a long way to go but his willingness to attend a cocktail party with Phoebe’s larger-than-life pals deserves admiration. But one gripe with Phoebe, it doesn’t matter that Banksy’s allure stemmed in part from the mystery about his identity, anonymity is not what JD needs. Well, it’s not all her fault, Phoebe’s ex-husband came up with the idea and Phoebe seemed to eventually realize that it was counterproductive.
2. Raif isn’t 100% bad. Despite being cocky and somewhat manipulative, Raif actually helped promote JD’s art show. It was mostly a ploy to get in Phoebe’s good graces, but if it helps get JD some recognition, it can be overlooked.
3. Gordon has anger-management issues. I’ve been giving that Gordon major side-eye since Day One. He is waaaaay too pushy about marrying Delia. Never trust a male bridezilla, ladies. But who knew that Gordon would be so tightly wound as to snap at Delia and party hostess Abby? It was shocking.
4. Delia can be intimidated. Didn’t you expect Delia to call out Gordon immediately and send him on his way? She slinked off when he stormed out of Abby’s party. It’s probably post-affair-related guilt. This is a worrisome turn of events.
5. Jake, you are not the father! Abby became curiously attached to Becca Riley, who is the ex-girlfriend of Abby’s soon-to-be-ex-husband. If that sentence confused you, join the club. With Jake out of the country, Abby has become a helicopter mom to Becca and even accompanied her into the delivery room. When Abby got a gander at the baby, didn’t you think her expression meant the baby looked like Jake? That baby looks nothing like Jake. Either Jake needs to do some digging on Ancestry.com to find his black roots or the baby was sired by someone else.
6. Welcome to the Hellmouth. When the air conditioning at Abby’s house went on the fritz, Dr. Harris likened it to the “Hellmouth.” I see what you did there, Marti Noxon. Can we get a reference to Dingoes Ate My Baby or the Bronze?
7. Jo gets some sweet buns. Jo isn’t just my favorite Girlfriends’ Guide to Divorce character, she’s one of my favorite TV characters period. Jo’s finally come to her senses and sampled Scott’s sweet treats. If only the baker could find a blanket instead of always putting his bare bum on the countertop and sofa. Seriously, though, the only issue with these two is the difficulty in coming up with a shipper hashtag. Neither #Jott no #Sco work and Jo’s last name, Frumpkis, is ridiculous and impossible to portmanteau.

Girlfriends’ Guide to Divorce airs Tuesdays at 10/9c on Bravo.

The takeaway from the latest Girlfriends’ Guide to Divorce episode, “Rule #81 There’s No Crying in Porn,” is that sometimes a man who looks good on paper isn’t all that he’s cracked up to be and a man who looks iffy on paper can exceed expectations. Exhibit A: Abby’s new guy, Dr. Harris,  is smart, attractive, wealthy, a career success and has a kind side; he was really sweet about her crying jag on their first date and even sent flowers. The doc can also take you to the White House Correspondents’ Dinner. But he didn’t take Abby, which is not cool because he brought it up to her, said he needed a date and ended up taking another woman. That’s kind of jerky. Why get her hopes up? Dr. Harris is not Mr. Right.  Here are the GG2D guys who are all wrong but the best Mr. Right Nows.

Carl: Downside: He’s a Vegas paid companion. Upside: He’s played by Victor Webster. Downside: He’s in a relationship. Upside: He’s played by Victor Webster and it’s an open relationship. Carl is willing to spend the night just listening to you and giving you a foot massage. He also offers Abby some spot-on advice about life and love. Carl is not the best long-term choice for Abby, but she doesn’t cry over him like she does with her estranged husband Jake and there isn’t as much pressure as there was with her ex-cutie Will. Abby is often in a state of confusion about her love life, so Carl makes a promising long-weekend companion when she needs a morale boost and no complications. He won’t get overly attached. And he’s portrayed by Victor Webster.

JD: Phoebe’s new friend is painfully shy, really needs to stand up for himself—he’s not getting any credit for his gallery-quality artwork—and having not made it around all the bases until now, he compared himself unfavorably to what he sees in porn. JD is also a sincere sweetie, a quick study and got the job done his first time without any upsetting porn techniques. (Phoebe made it clear the “money shot” was not happening.) JD is nowhere near as smooth as Marco, who left Phoebe so he could focus on his sobriety, but bisexual free spirit Phoebe’s had so much experience JD could be a refreshing change of pace. She just better hope he doesn’t fall in love with her because breaking his heart would be way too guilt-inducing.

Scott: Jo’s employee at the bakery has some major drawbacks. He can’t keep it zipped and insists on sitting on the counter with a bare bottom, which means you’d have to spend way too much money on sanitizer. Upside: He’s British and has a charming accent and more importantly, he’s a baking superstar. Presumably spending the night with him would lead to waking up with fresh-baked croissants and pastries, which places him higher on the list than Craig and JD. Scott is protective of Jo. He hauled her embarrassing date out of Delia and Gordon’s engagement party and joined Jo’s fight for ownership of the bakery, which her ex-husband and his annoying new wife have been circling like buzzards. Naturally, Scott did it with his pants off, but still, it was a heroic gesture. Scott is probably intrigued by the only woman who doesn’t immediately join him in the supply closet. The forecast for a monogamous relationship isn’t likely, but Scott should definitely be on Jo’s speed-dial as a friend with benefits and champion.

Girlfriends’ Guide to Divorce airs Mondays at 10/9c on Bravo.

On the episode “Rule #79 Labels are for Canned Goods,” somebody sent bride-to-be Delia a pretty gift box containing photos of her fling with her boss. Having sex with your married employer behind your fiancées’ back isn’t the cakewalk you’d imagine it to be. So, who is blackmailing Delia? Here are the prime suspects.

1. Albert’s wife. Delia and Albert have been doing the deed in the office and we’ve seen Albert’s wife come for a visit, maybe she caught wind of the affair. These types of photos usually are a bargaining chip for money. Albert is already rich so his wife doesn’t need Delia’s money, but maybe she sent the pics for the sheer satisfaction of tormenting Delia and scaring her off. That takes some Machiavellian skills. We don’t know enough about the woman scorned to have a handle on her level of vindictiveness.
2. Gordon’s mom. Sure, she seems all sweet but noticed that Delia hasn’t shown the bride-to-be enthusiasm one would expect. Maybe Mama Bear doesn’t like Delia as much as she seemed to when they met at the engagement party and is doing this to expose her son’s fiancée. If that’s the case, she could simply give the photos to her son but that wouldn’t make her look like Mom of the Year. Gordon’s mother could just be trying to get Delia to call things off without looking like she had anything to do with it.
3. Gordon. He’s been annoyingly pushy about this wedding since the beginning despite the fact that Delia has expressed reservations. Gordon doesn’t have much of a motive though except to make her feel guilty and maybe manipulate Delia into fidelity. Gordon is such a bridezilla and determined to get his own way, it’s feasible.
4. Albert. He’s been subtly expressing interest in Delia and giving Gordon side-eye before the affair started. She called things off—again—in this episode and his parting gift was a bit, what’s the word? Let’s just say it involves Latin and move on. It’s quite the gambit, but maybe Albert thinks it will lead to a breakup with Gordon. It would be nuts because Albert would also be exposing his own behavior. Albert does not appear to be crazy.

We don’t know much about Gordon’s mom but I think we should bring her down to the station for questioning.

Girlfriends’ Guides to Divorce airs Tuesdays at 10/9c on Bravo.

1. Phoebe is fun and thoughtful. She organized a spa day for her friends. Okay, Jo was too twitchy to enjoy her much-needed pampering treatment and took off, but it was sweet of Phoebe to arrange it and, at least, it helped Delia, who is dealing with the stress of keeping an affair with her boss from her fiancé, Gordon.
2. Phoebe is talented. Her party-planning skills resulted in a lavish engagement party for Delia and Gordon. She hired beauties and hunks to serve as decor and who doesn’t like a raw bar with plentiful shrimp cocktail and an open bar? Jo’s Tinder date liked it a bit too much and ended up getting sloppy, standing on a table and dropping trou, but Phoebe remained unruffled.
3. Phoebe knows how to rock a flowy maxi dress. That’s a superpower. The look doesn’t flatter most women. Given the plunging necklines and backless designs, maybe maxi isn’t the best adjective for the dresses, but actress Beau Garrett wears them like an ethereal goddess.
4. Phoebe is into bettering herself. The former fashion model recently earned her GED, and now she’s taking college courses.
5. Phoebe takes on intimidating projects. She was part of a magazine shoot featuring models without makeup. It turned out she was the only one willing to display her bare-faced beauty and there was a lot of mean-spirited antics going on behind the scenes. Uninterested in engaging in the farce, Phoebe glided off.
6. Phoebe holds her own. The college class on gender studies was dreadful. She was surrounded by grim heifers with superior attitudes and no fashion sense. She ended up telling off her male instructor who was curiously leading the discussion on feminism.
7. Phoebe explores intriguing opportunities. Her gender studies teacher is a hot guy, and they did some smooching. No reason to hold a grudge, right? They went on a gallery date.
8. Phoebe refuses to be walking facial hair. The hot teacher is a closeted gay. He introduced her to his mom, which was clearly for show. Phoebe bailed on their date immediately. We didn’t even see her say good-bye as she exited the exhibit.
9. Phoebe wastes no time. Once she was informed her teacher is playing for the other team, she left the ordinary art exhibit with a new acquaintance (the tattletale) who took her to an event featuring funky street art. That sort of thing befits her bohemian ways.
10. She is forgiving. Delia was a blazing bitch to Phoebe at the engagement party because she really doesn’t want to marry Gordon. Delia insinuated that Phoebe is dumb. Then Abby was snippy with Phoebe and stole her thunder at the prom, which was supposed to celebrate Phoebe’s GED. Despite the fact that Abby diminished her accomplishment, Phoebe rose above it and accepted Abby’s apology.
11. She’s warm and engaging. Abby’s editor Barbara, who can be a tough nut to crack, took an immediate liking to Phoebe and offered her a chance to write an article about the prom for SheShe. Phoebe ended up declining the offer—probably because she was over Abby’s drama—but if Barbara thinks she’s capable, then capable, she is.
12. Phoebe shows up. When Delia went wedding dress shopping, Phoebe was there. She  doesn’t miss those workouts in the park and meets the girls for coffee or cocktails and listens to their problems without judgement. Everyone should have a friend like Phoebe. Scratch that, everyone should be a friend like Phoebe.

Girlfriends’ Guide to Divorce airs Tuesdays at 10/9c on Bravo.

1. Talk it out. During the conference in NYC, Abby McCarthy and the not-so-good Dr. Harris had a stimulating phone conversation, it was a self-stimulating phone chat if you catch my drift. He did act like a jerk the next morning but it’s admirable that he encourages Abby to take matters into her own hands.
2. Take a trip together. Long lines at the checkpoints, excessive baggage fees and tiny seats are vexing but there are ways to make air travel more enjoyable. Abby and Dr. Harris joined the mile-high club on the return flight to Los Angeles. Or you can enjoy a ride in the car, which is what Abby did with Jake.
3. Stand up for yourself. After Abby broke young hottie Will’s heart so she could commit to a reconciliation with Jake, Will and Abbie said goodbye on the street. Things got heated and Abby found her back up against a wall.
4. Get cyber savvy. Jo has been finding her temporary workers, such as the one she brought to Delia’s engagement party, on Tinder. Yes, he made a spectacle of himself and the evening out was an unmitigated disaster but he wasn’t so bad for an hour or so at her apartment. Actually, her online shopping hasn’t been going that well, skip this tip. It’s an awful idea. Don’t let creepy strangers into your home.
5. Welcome ladies and gentlemen. As we discovered in Season 1, adventurous Phoebe is bi so she casts a wide net and isn’t afraid to double up on occasion.
6. Think about office supplies. Delia has been spending after-hours time with her boss at the law firm and is clearly interested in more than legal briefs. We haven’t seen Jo hook up with the pastry chef at her bakery, but it’s only a matter of time until she desires something hot and flaky.

Girlfriends’ Guide to Divorce airs Tuesdays at 10/9c on Bravo.

1. Barbara is played by Retta. The actress whose Parks and Rec character Donna Meagle joined Tom Haverford to give us these words of wisdom: Treat Yo’ Self and changed our lives forever.
2. Barbara sets boundaries. She may not have an office door, or even an office, but she improvises with a partition that would impress Les Nessman. When Jo overshared about her ex-husband’s fondness for porn and her plans to dominate him with her boobs, Barbara politely but firmly let Jo know that it was TMI. Even Jo realized that she’s said too much which is impressive. Let’s hope they become friends.
3. She treats Phoebe like she has a brain. In a recent episode, Delia implied that Phoebe is stupid (she apologized, but still). The former model just got her GED and Barbara invited her to write about her experiences for SheShe. Phoebe is the sweetest and most level-headed character and it’s good to see her get some full-fledged appreciation. Let’s hope they also become friends.
4. Barbara knows when to put Abby in check. It all started when Barbara took issue with her fellow divorcee’s column which makes marital breakups sound fun and glamorous. Abby blew Barbara off during the meeting before she found out that Babs would be her editor. When she caught Abby stealing Phoebe’s thunder at the prom and then making light of Phoebe’s GED accomplishment, Barbara let Abby have it. (Abby apologized but still.)
5. She tells the truth. “Sea urchins? White people will eat anything.”
6. She’s doesn’t tolerate party crashers and is a good bouncer. “Who let Ian Ziering in? I’ll be right back.” Even Barbara is infallible: for some reason, she let Janice Dickinson into the bash.
7. Barbara knows how to pull off a totally rad ’80s theme party. She shot down Abby’s “under the sea” idea for Phoebe’s prom because, let’s face it, mermen are stupid. Barbara also has superb costume ideas: “I’m gonna go full Cyndi Lauper with a bit of Sheena Easton with some pink frosty lipgloss. When the working day is done, Barbara just wants to have fun.

Girlfriends’ Guide to Divorce airs Tuesdays at 10/9c on Bravo.

Now that Girlfriends’ Guide to Divorce’s  Abby McCarthy and Jake’s reconciliation attempt is kaput—maybe—she has to go through the heartbreak all over again. But as Barbara, her tough-talking editor and fellow divorcee is quick to point out, Abby doesn’t have it that bad. Here are recovery tips.

1. Walk around her house. Abby McCarthy’s home is spacious, airy, filled with cool furniture and artwork and there’s that built-in pool. She can grieve the end of her marriage in comfort and style.
2. Coordinate a ladies’ night. It’s called Girlfriends’ Guide to Divorce not The Lone Wolf’s Guide. Abby needs to patch things up with her BFF Jo. She also has been quite lax when it comes to her relationships with Phoebe and Delia.
3. Host a theme party. It only took a couple of hours for Abby to transform her living room into a retro rave for an impromptu private party with Jake. Abby busted out the glow sticks, mood lights and techno music in under a couple of hours. Bonus points for finding shiny gold shorts in her closet and being able to fit into them.
4. Donate to charity. Neither Abby nor any grownup should wear shiny gold shorts, she can hand them over to Goodwill. And there are plenty of women who could benefit from her designer outfits. She should donate them to ladies in need—such as TV bloggers…
5. Focus her energy on “work.” A public meltdown over her strained marriage led to a new career as a celebrity divorcee. Now Abby’s job responsibilities include dates with attractive successful bachelors like Dr. Harris. That’s a fine reason to become a workaholic.
6. Gloat about her inferior successor. After breaking up with Abby,  Jake moved on with Becca Riley, a low-tier starlet with a CW show. Becca’s not exactly Angelina Jolie. There’s not much chance that Abby will have to relive the pain every time she passes a newsstand. Taking the high road is vastly overrated.

Girlfriends’ Guide to Divorce airs Tuesdays at 10/9c on Bravo.

The men on the latest Girlfriends’ Guide to Divorce, “Timing is Everything” ran the gamut from dream date to total nightmare. Who made the grade and who needs to get left behind. Here’s our rating.

Adam:  Jo’s Tinder date hoarded shrimp at the raw bar, left Jo’s side to lurk at the open bar and made a spectacle of himself by dropping trou at the engagement party. Mooching for cable, really? What’s next, access to Jo’s Netflix password? — F.

Jake: Sorry, but Jake is losing points. It’s not just that he got Becca pregnant, it’s that he dated her in the first place. You don’t switch from Veuve Clicquot’s to Kool-Aid. Going from sophisticated Abby to the vapid starlet was a major downgrade. After he dragged his feet on telling Abby about the baby news, he claimed the moral high ground when she ‘fessed up about her tryst with Will. Rise up, #Wabby shippers. — D.

Gordon: Willingness to commit is good, but he’s really pushy about the scale of the impending wedding. Delia is obviously wary of the situation. Nobody likes a Bridezilla. Plus, he seems sketchy. — C-

Dr. Harris: Being chivalrous and comforting during Abby’s crying jag was sweet. Offering to keep the date going with chocolate souflée was even sweeter. Sending that pricey bouquet in the wake of that debacle was the sweetest. After her row with Jake, Abby needed that pick-me-up. The only reason he’s not getting an “A” is because flirting with a stranger on Twitter is weird. — B

Scott: Hmm, a burgeoning celebrity chef who looks like a model, takes care of Jo, behaves like her date when her actual date is a disaster and even hauls the jerk out of the shindig to spare Jo from further humiliation? The accent alone makes the grade.— A+

Girlfriends’ Guide to Divorce airs Tuesdays at 10/9c on Bravo.