3 Things Longer than Hakeem’s Kidnapping on Empire
Watching the Thriller video. The long version runs a little over 13 minutes. The greatest music video of all time runs longer than Hakeem’s kidnapping and the zombies were more interesting.
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10 Thoughts on Quantico: “God” — Nov. 1, 2015
Quantico is a glorious cocktail. Take one part Melrose Place add one part Homeland, shake, garnish with How to Get Away with Murder and voilà — you’ve got a sexy, hilarious mystery. Hot FBI recruits flirt, scheme, hook up and keep secrets as they train to keep America safe. Months later drop-dead gorgeous Alex Parrish is accused of masterminding a terrorist attack and the most conspicuous incognito fugitive works to clear her name and figure out if one of her classmates set her up. Her hair and makeup remain on-point.
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Sleepy Hollow: “Dead Men Tell No Tales” — Oct. 29, 2015
Back to the Witness mission, Crane feels guilty; Washington sent him to kill Howe, and he failed. Had Crane succeeded, the war may have ended more quickly. Crane has a lot of guilt issues. What he should feel bad about is Joe Corbin, who arrives at Jenny’s trailer with two bags of groceries. That’s what happens when you are gainfully employed, Crane.
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37 Thoughts on the Bones/Sleepy Hollow Crossover
Bones is shipping the hell out of Ichabbie. The Sleepy Hollow writers are begging us not to lose our shit over the Crextra foolishness. Don’t worry, Sleepyheads, she is just a plot device who will be shivved in the season finale.
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Sleepy Hollow Adds Jessica Camacho as Series Regular
Jessica Camacho, who appeared in the “Blood and Fear” episode, has landed a spot as a series regular. You’ll remember that Sophie stole the Shard of Anubis from Randall Martin and left him cuffed to a shower railing. Jenny’s increased visibility, in what I like to think of as an in-show spinoff, The Jenny & Joe Show, requires additional characters so that we can see Jenny in the artifact-hunting mode we’d only heard about.
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Sleepy Hollow: “The Sisters Mills” — Oct. 22, 2015
Ichabod plants himself on the sofa watching video games (which he picked up from Joe Corbin, by the way) consuming salty carbs and sugary carbonated drinks. He is pretty close to being American. Final test: Does Ichabod get irrationally angry about having to press 1 for English?
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9 Thoughts on Quantico: “Found” — Oct. 25, 2015
The long, national nightmare is over: Alex and Ryan finally did it again with some undercover role-playing. Very steamy. The suite looked more comfortable than the reverse-cowgirl in the car.
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Empire’s Lucious — The Devil Made Him Do It
Cookie Lyon took the rap for Lucious and spent 17 years in prison while he used the money from their drug operation to become a music mogul. He didn’t visit her, didn’t give her any credit for Empire’s success and didn’t even put some money in her commissary account so she could afford a Kit-Kat bar or some shea butter. Nobody wants to be peckish and ashy.
